Breaking news. NASA will be sending “naked illustrations,” both male and female, into space to lure aliens.
No word yet on whose perfect bodies NASA has selected to model but Bartolo Colon is said to be the clear front-runner in the men’s division.
With gas at $4.67 a gallon and 401ks shrinking faster than Ranger goalie Igor Sherterkin, the irresponsible Stitches looks to the Mets for some quick cash.
The Mets have become road warriors with a record of 11-5 prior to Tuesday night’s 4-2 win over the Nationals in D.C. Tylor Megill fell back to earth after five heavenly starts.
Suffered his first loss of the year, allowing three runs to the Braves.
The Nats, in a different time zone than the first-place Mets are 3-11 at home. Aaron Sanchez has surrendered 13 runs over 13 ²/₃ innings. Play 10 units on the Mets.
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Rafael Devers’ grand salami was the key hit in a six-run second inning and the Red Sox chopped down the Bravos 9-4. Victory. Up +253 petrocellis.